One of the biggest mental blocks that I need to learn to overcome, is being afraid to do things because I’m scared that I won’t be as good at it as somebody else.
Today I filmed 3 youtube videos for my youtube channel. This is a big deal for me… convincing myself to film when it’s 90 degrees IN THE HOUSE and I have a cold. However the biggest hurdle of them all is that I’m constantly afraid that I’m not good enough. I’m afraid that I’m not good at editing. I’m afraid that I’m not “good” on camera. I’m afraid people will judge my makeup, or my hair, or my clothes. I’m afraid that my iphone-and-spiderlamp-and-desklight filming setup can’t compete with the highly produced videos that oversaturate the internet today. I’m afraid that my bedroom isn’t cute enough to be shown on youtube, where it seems that every 16 year old girl can afford the bedroom of my dreams. My fears may seem futile to you. But they come from a very real place in my heart that longs for success and is afraid of failure.
The reason I decided to write a blog post about this subject, is because I know that so many other people are dealing with these fears as well. Maybe not these exact ones. But similar. So many people never reach success because they are afraid of being uncomfortable.
Yes, I am scared to put myself out there. Yes, I am still learning how to be a better blogger and youtuber and musician and adult as I go. Yes, people might judge me. Yes, I have these fears. They gnaw and scratch at the pit of my stomach. But I will NOT let my fears hold me back from reaching my goals.
I can’t afford a thousand dollar camera right now. Or soft box lighting. Or final cut pro. Or a ring light. I can’t afford to move into a cuter house with AC that works more than half the time and a bedroom that was made for Pinterest boards.
But you know what? I’m never going to afford those things if I don’t throw away my fears and do with what I have until I can afford to level up.
So please, if you are reading this and you are in the same place as I am tonight… A little sad… A little frustrated… But you have places you want to be…
Don’t let something as stupid as a low budget filming setup get in the way of your dreams.